Daily Zoot - 9/10/09 - College Football Pre-Zoot Pt. 2

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If you were with us yesterday we started our College Football Preview off with a list of teams that I love. If you missed out there's plenty of time to catch up, I'll wait.


The subject of today's portion of the preview is a little less sunshine and lollipops, and a little more failed third-down conversions and blown defensive assignments. I don't know any of the players or coaches I'm about to write about personally so I am not saying I hate them as individuals, that would just be mean. When I say I hate these schools, I'm just saying that I hate their chances this season. For example, I'm sure the Detroit Lions are all perfectly nice guys, but Super Bowl this season? Not so much. So if you're a fan of any of these teams, don't take it personally; this is not an affront directed specifically towards you (for the most part). Now that we've got that settled, lets get on to the list.

Teams I Hate:

Penn State Nittany Lions
Yesterday I was done betting against USC, today I'm done betting on the Big Ten. Rose Bowl after Rose Bowl, championship game after championship game, Big Ten teams get thumped by teams in other conferences. The lone exception is Ohio State hanging tight with Texas in last year's Fiesta Bowl, and that still wound up as a loss. Penn State got manhandled by USC in the Rose Bowl last year. Since then they have lost their best defensive player (Aaron Maybin), another productive linebacker (Dan Connor), and their top three receivers to the NFL. Why am I supposed to believe that if they get back to BCS bowl they will fare any better than they did last year when they were much more talented? I do love Joe Pa(which is why I decided to omit any old jokes from this bit, an incredibly tough thing for me to do). And to be honest I think PSU is a win against Ohio State away from winning the Big Ten. I'm just questioning how much that title is worth.

Notre Dame Fighting Irish
Remember when I said that this article was not going to be personal for the most part? This is that least part I was referring to. I just flat out hate Notre Dame. I hate that Charlie Weiss is considered a good coach because he was able to win with Ty Willingham's players. I hate that people were shocked and appalled that Brady "the second coming" Quinn fell out of the top 10, when two years later he can only barely beat out the shadow of Derek Andersen for the starting job on a bad Cleveland Browns team. I hate Jeff Samardzija, and that I had to look up how to spell his name just now. Notre Dame was no good last year, and just as bad the year before. But because of a blowout win in a bowl game over Hawaii, they earned a pre-season top-25 ranking. Now they are ranked in the top-20, and we're about two wins away from having the pundits Label them, "back." People are excited about how many players the golden domers are returning from last year, but those are all players from a team that finished one game over .500. They might win 9-10 games this season, but not a single one against a team with any relevance.

The Entire ACC
I could have scrapped the title "teams that I hate" and just called this the Atlantic Coast Conference Preview Edition. In the first week of games, the entire conference mustered 5 wins. 3 were against 1-AA opponents, and one was against another ACC school (Even though it was Miami over a good Florida State team, I'm not counting that one because its a head-to-head, somebody had to win it). In total there was a very lonely one victory against a non-ACC division
1-A school; and that was Clemson over the perennial BCS Conference punching bag Middle Tennessee State. Its sad that one of the BCS games has to be between the "winners" of this conference and the Big East. Off the top of you head, can you name the two teams that played in the Orange Bowl Last Year? Let alone the winner? I don't think the people who organized the game itself could. Parody is a good thing to have in a league, but not if everyone is equally terrible.


Ok fine one JoePa is old joke before I go.

Joe Paterno is so old...
(you) How old is he?
Joe Paterno is so old that he considers natural causes the toughest opponent he'll have to face this season.

Thank you thank you, I'll be here all week, don't forget to tip tour waitresses. Try the Veal.