Daily Zoot- 3/10/09 - Locked Up edition

The Daily Zoot is all the news you needed to know yesterday, soon

-Surprisingly, no one is bidding on Michael Vick's Georgia mansion at auction. Apparently, no one wants to be haunted by Dog Ghosts for the rest of their life. I don't understand that; everything I know about Dog Ghosts makes them look awesome. Vick is out of his actual jail cell now and into a halfway house which raises a good question: I know pros don't ask pros for autographs because they're both in the league, but what's the etiquette on asking for an autograph if you're in the same Halfway House? 

-Charles Barkley was let out of jail yesterday after serving a three day sentence for a DUI arrest late last year. What kind of sentence is 3 days? I thought you could 5-10 for driving without a seatbelt let alone drunk with a hooker that looked like she was played by Eddie Murphy, or Martin Lawrence, or Eddie Murphy. What no one seems to be mentioning is that during the night on Saturday, in the middle of his weekend stay at the Federal Hilton, we moved the clock forward an hour. What a genius move by the Chuckster to use daylight savings to cut his prison term short by an hour. Charles Barkley: 1 American Justice System: Won.

-Jaguars WR Matt Jones was arrested and jailed Monday for violating the terms of a plea deal. Jones was originally charged for possession last July when a Cop found him in a car, cutting up cocaine. Now I am not familiar with cocaine, but I gotta think there's a better place to do it than in a car with GLASS WINDOWS. I mean, where is the back of a nightclub urinal or a stripper's ass when you need one, right? Jones broke that deal by having "a few beers" on the golf course with friends. Now having a few beers on the golf course is something I am familiar with, and let me say that arresting someone for drinking on the golf course is like arresting someone for fighting at a hockey game, or a bird for trying to fly. You can't fight what comes natural